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Six Steps for Passing a Drug Test

We’re not condoning anything illegal here, but the website Jezebel.com has an article on how to pass a workplace drug test if you’ve been smoking something you shouldn’t be… and it sounds like they know what they’re talking about.

Step #1.)  Don’t Waste Your Money on Commercial Cleansers. Some people swear they work, but there’s no real scientific evidence that they do.  And some of them cost $50.

Plus, even if they DO work, most of them just contain herbal diuretics that you can buy at the drug store for half the price.

Step #2.)  Drink a Lot of Water. As soon as you find out you have a drug test, start drinking.  And keep drinking until right before you go in.

Traces of marijuana can be detected for up to six weeks, but you can TEMPORARILY detox your body if you drink enough water and flush your system.

Step #3.)  Take Midol. That’s right, the stuff women take for bloating.  It’s a diuretic, and it makes you have to pee more often, which helps flush your system.

Coffee and cranberry juice do the same thing, but not as well.  And diet pills do it too, but they also might make you test positive for some kind of amphetamine.

Step #4.)  Take a B-Complex Multivitamin. Drinking water and taking diuretics will make your urine clear . . . which can make the lab technician suspicious.  So if you want to be extra-safe, the vitamins B-2 and B-12 will make it yellow again.

Just take 100 milligrams of a B-complex multivitamin two hours before your test.

Step #5.)  Take Aspirin. Studies show that it might interfere with the drug test and mask certain things they’re checking for.  Jezebel.com suggests taking four aspirin four-to-six hours before your test.

Step #6.)  Use the Bathroom Several Times Before Your Appointment. If you wake up and go straight to your test, there’s a better chance you’ll test positive.

So you should go at least twice before your appointment, which will give them the “cleanest” sample you possibly can.

(Jezebel.com)(Youtube.com)

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