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Hooters Is Opening a New Restaurant Where Servers Will Be Fully-Clothed Because Who Doesn’t Want That?

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More is better. Except when it comes to attire.

Hooters is shaking up its business model by announcing it will be opening a new restaurant called Hoots, A Hooters Joint.

What makes Hoots different from Hooters, other than the lack of an “e” and an “r?” There are two distinctive differences:

  1. There will be both male and female servers. And they won’t be wearing the skimpy outfits that are the calling card of the women who work at Hooters.
  2. The menu will be made up of Hooters’ most popular items.

A smaller menu? We can deal with that. But men and women doing customer service? That’s just a travesty. Isn’t half the fun of going to Hooters paying for wings and having a scantily-clad young lady pretending her name is Candi pretending to be interested in talking to you in the name of getting a nice tip? Men don’t want to go to “Hoots” to be waited on by some dude named Bruce looking to make some extra coin until construction work picks up more.

But maybe we’re wrong.

We’ll have a better idea when the first Hoots opens later this month in Cicero, Ill. It will feature counter service (so much for Candi sauntering over to your table) and seat 75 people.

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