5 Apps That Would Make Better Movies Than ‘Angry Birds’
They are seriously making an ‘Angry Birds‘ movie. What will it be about? Who would be in it (aside from obviously Nicki Minaj)? Will it just be Nicki Minaj doing everyone’s voices? It raises a lot questions, but none are more depressing than ‘if ‘Angry Birds,’ then _____?’ They’re turning a phone app into a movie. We predict this is the beginning of a terrible trend. If we’re right, here are five more apps you can expect to see on the big screen.
If you think about it, this would probably actually make a better movie than ‘Angry Birds.’ A dude running away from a bunch of angry gorillas. Plus jewels are involved. And flames.
By dinner hours, he’s a chef. But once the grill is clean…he’s a NINJA! Again, sounds more feasible than an ‘Angry Birds’ movie. We probably shouldn’t have put this one out there, because now it’s going to happen.
Okay, so this personal training app doesn’t automatically lend itself to a big screen-ready story. But tell that to whoever greenlit ‘Battleship’! Here’s the pitch: a high school loser who has to run to win the heart of the girl he loves. Literally — she’s captain of the cross country team. Also, she needs a baboon heart to live and if wins the race she can afford an operation or something. Cast Channing Tatum and Jennifer Lawrence and get ready to sit back and count the overseas box office dollars.
We’ve all used Open Table to make a reservation before, and Hollywood loves brand loyalty. So here’s the pitch: “Everyone wants a date with Lisa, but you can’t take her just anywhere — she’s the toughest food critic in town. With Katherine Heigl, Josh Hartnett, Matthew McConaughey and Oliver Platt as The Gay Friend.”
We don’t know what it will be about, but ‘Instagram: The Movie’ will definitely look over-saturated and clog up your Facebook feed with pictures of groceries from the farmer’s market.